Tune in to Intuition
Is our intuition being silenced by technology?
There are many advantages to having an endless supply of advice, guides and online help. This wealth of information at our fingertips should be allowing us to become confident parents, right? Well that’s not always the case.
Working with families every day has allowed me to see the downside of a constant influence of social media, the web, and chat sites.
I commonly hear comments like “no one else seems to be struggling” or “everyone else’s child sleeps, why can’t mine?” Mothers are feeling a constant pressure to have it all together.
It comes in the form of ‘lost Mums’ – confused, burdened and feeling inadequate by the constant access to endless sources of information and social media influences. We are able to communicate more freely with each other than ever before, yet mothers still feel so alone. I commonly hear comments like “no one else seems to be struggling” or “everyone else’s child sleeps, why can’t mine?”. Mothers are feeling a constant pressure to have it all together. The daily flood of others’ happy family snaps and reminders that our friends’ little ones are reaching all of their milestones has for some parents become a measure or reflection of our own parenting abilities.
The Ability to Log Off
The ability to log-off and parent by intuition seems to be a rarity these days – an online encyclopedia can leave us trying everything and feeling helpless if no resolve. So are we spending too much time online self-diagnosing our parental flaws? Do we allow ourselves the time to learn about them, their individual cues, behaviours and temperament? One of the most powerful things we can give our little ones is the gift of time, time for their tummy’s to mature, time for them to reach developmental milestones and time to get to know one another.
One of the most powerful things we can give our little ones is the gift of time, time for their tummy’s to mature, time for them to reach developmental milestones and time to get to know one another.
What I Recommend
So here is what I recommend. Listen to your intuition as a parent – understand that people’s information often comes from their own experience and that may not be applicable to yours. It seems everyone today has an opinion that they would love to share! (but not everyone actually knows what they’re talking about). Turning to too many sources of information can often lead to a vast array of conflicting advice, leaving you even more confused and overwhelmed than when you started. So learn to be selective – seek quality advice from people and professional sources that you trust.
Log off – If you find yourself constantly overwhelmed, obsessed with searching or lost in the World Wide Web it might be time to take a break from the online flurry. For some the internet can be a source of reassurance but for many it can cause an overwhelming sense of confusion and anxiety.
The process of getting to know your bub takes time, so be patient with yourself and know there is not always one ‘right way’ of doing things. The way forward will be what you find works for you and your family, and that can’t always be found on-line. Eventually, when you have the confidence to log-in again, do it with the understanding that you are capable, and most of all, trust your intuition and believe in yourself!
Tara Mitchell – The Gentle Sleep Specialist
As a Paediatric Nurse, Mother and Qualified infant and toddler Sleep Consultant I work with families to resolve sleep issues and create positive routines within the home. Sleep is a pillar of health and effects the entire family’s mental, emotional and physical well-being. Contact me to get your little one sleeping well and follow my Facebook page for regular hints & tips.